Saturday, December 18, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Eighteenth Ring

This blog post can drink in most provinces of Canada.

Reverb Prompt #18
December 18 – Try What do you want to try next year? Is there something you wanted to try in 2010? What happened when you did / didn’t go for it? 


The big thing I would like to try next year would be to get a web comic up and running. I really think this would give me a depository for many of my random ideas, get me into a creative discipline, do more drawing. I have been inspired by "Making Webcomics" and "Webcomics weekly" to give it a try. It is only a matter of focus.


Not doing this in 2010 was a general disappointment in myself. A sense that I wasn't giving my talents a honest shot, seeing how far they can go. It led to some self-pity that wasn't really healthy. I need to avoid that feeling in 2011.

Ripples in a Pool - Seventeenth Ring

I can't think of anything funny about the number seventeen. Apparently it is a serious number.

Reverb Prompt #17
December 17 – Lesson Learned What was the best thing you learned about yourself this past year? And how will you apply that lesson going forward?


I seem to be coming off rather sappy, but my daughter has tended to be my focus and any lessons learned tend to centre around the raising of offspring. There were more abstract lessons from the books I read this year. Gems of knowledge acquired in the completion of spreadsheets at work (making data sing).


Out of all these bobbles, the greatest lesson I learned that you just have to keep going. Things are not as bad as your tired mind says. Just one step at a time.

Thursday, December 16, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Sixteenth Ring

Sixteen Candles.

Prompt #16
December 16 – Friendship How has a friend changed you or your perspective on the world this year? Was this change gradual, or a sudden burst?


As I have mentioned in previous reverbs, this has been a long year. I have spent most of it learning to be a father and learning who my daughter is as she is slowly becoming a person. So I guess if I consider my daughter a friend then she has changed me the most as we both learn each other's language and form a relationship.


Otherwise, my friendships this year have been about stablitiy. Keeping me grounded rather than "blowing my mind" Maybe in 2011. 

Ripples in a Pool - Fifteenth Ring

All I can think of is that it is one of the numbers in LOST.  Anyways, Reverb continues.

Prompt #15
December 15 – 5 Minutes Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010. 


Five minutes go:
- You spent half the year on paternal leave and enjoyed it.
- Your daughter loves you very much and can now say so.
- Your daughter skipped crawling and made you hold her hands so she could walk
- You read 50 books (check your book journal they are written down there)
- Your Dad is better now, it turns out he had CO2 poisoning
- Mom & Dad celebrated their 40 year wedding anniversary. You help run it at Aunt Joan's cottage.
- Your Uncle passed away and you gave the eulogy that your Dad and Aunt wrote. It was well received.
- Your daughter loves swimming, it makes her laugh. 
- Watching the sun rise at the cottage, as your daughter had kicked you out of bed. Listening to the birds and seeing the world light up with each inch the sun rose.
- You had five book club meeting where you laughed, discussed interesting topics, and had really good food all themed on the chosen book.


I'm not sure it bullet points are cheating, but these would be the big things. What is unfortunate is that five minutes doesn't let you capture all the small moments that filled the year.

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Fourteenth Ring

According to the Internet, fourteen has something to do with masons.

Prompt #14
December 14 – Appreciate What’s the one thing you have come to appreciate most in the past year? How do you express gratitude for it? 


There are a number of things that fit this bill. Fortunately I have to choose a thing. In my mind its a tie between reading and time. Reading as I haven't had as much time to do so as I normally do, making every book much more important. This really falls under the umbrella of time. As a new parent I have discovered that you don't really have less time, just less energy to spread over the same amount of time. Babies don't really understand alone time (or how to help with chores) so I have come to appreciate the moments I have to do what I want to do.

Monday, December 13, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Thirteenth Ring

I think its the warehouse where the Aliens are kept...

Reverb Prompt #13
December 13 – Action When it comes to aspirations, it’s not about ideas. It’s about making ideas happen. What’s your next step?


Finally, this one is easy. Step one: Get some sleep, Step two: write my short story Christmas present, Step Three: Write Christmas poem present. Step Four: Write Steampunk novel. 


Not it's just a matter of actually doing the work. :)

Sunday, December 12, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Twelfth Ring

Twelve Drummers Drumming...

Reverb Prompt #12
December 12 – Body Integration This year, when did you feel the most integrated with your body? Did you have a moment where there wasn’t mind and body, but simply a cohesive YOU, alive and present? 


I must confess that I have never really put much stock in "alive" moments. They seem largely a trick to me, when I let my ego get trapped in the notion that there are things that are just more "real". To use an example, a McDonald's burger is just as authentic as a locally made buffalo burger. You can argue that one is better than the other and by certain measures (such as environmental or aesthetic) one is a clear winner over the other. That doesn't change the fact that they are both real. Therefore, if I'm sitting down at my desk working on a spreadsheet or standing on the rocking cliffs of Bon Echo looking over its deep lake and seeing a thunderstorm in the distance, both are real. The challenge is to find "the good" in both moments and if you can't you need to figure out if you can remove either from your life or just accept it as part of what is you. 


I'm getting a little sidetracked. I guess, I am skeptical that my body and mind are not one. They tend to spend most of their time together. I can understand finding moments of being "present". Filtering out everything around you in a focus that allows the task to be completed, the art to be enjoyed, the data to be puzzled, is a good skill to have. Yet 21st employment is abstract (i.e. working on spreadsheets) and doesn't require the body to the same extent, unless one counts typing. Most of my "body/mind" activities that would mean the description are complicated tasks, like cleaning or cooking.  Exercise I find is either brain numbing or brain supercharging. As a random aside, I wish a device existed that could transcribe your thoughts while you exercise, I fear some of my best ideas come to me when I am hiking in the middle of nowhere.


In the end, there is more to a person than "perfect moments", there is you in your moments of weakness as well. I believe in personal change, just not the clear cutting method. Whatever journey you are on, your luggage goes with you. The disintegrated  you is as much you as the integrated you, perhaps not as easy to look at, a relative that you are embarrassed to bring to parties. 


Looking over this blog entry, apparently I have a chip on my shoulder about this. I am very passionate about the real and believe its worth defending. Taking a step back, I could answer this question in the way of sport, achieving excellence in some complete sporting event. This didn't come to mind as I'm not much of a sport person (likely the reason for this rambling post). 


Anyways, thoughts expressed; I'm stopping myself now. :)

Saturday, December 11, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Eleventh Ring

Eleven Pipers Piping...

Prompt #11
December 11 – 11 Things What are 11 things your life doesn’t need in 2011? How will you go about eliminating them? How will getting rid of these 11 things change your life?


Eleven? That's one more than a top ten list, which is hard enough as it is (I feel like I'm coming across as a monocle popping nobleman, ruffled that the simplest lapse in decor). Okay, eleven things. 


1. Borrowed books: This could technically count as eleven things all on its own, but I'll be good and count it as one. Basically I need to go through my borrowed books and either read them or give them back. The advantage of doing this is freeing up space and reading a bunch of good books.
2. Old clothes: I have a bunch of old clothes in the closet that I frankly need to get rid of so I can store other things there. Just a matter of getting a Saturday to do it.
3. Notebooks: I started a project last year to type of the 15 years of notes/scribbles I have collected over the year. It is taking a long time, but I hope to be more focused on writing next year, thus getting these notebooks into digital format.
4. The records under the bed:They are the classic records that My Grandfather listened to, so I need to get them digitized and loaded onto my ipod. I started this project, but it is a lot of work. Something to work on in 2011.
5. Dead pens: We have a lot of dead pens in the condo. I really need to systemically identify them and get rid of them instead of my finding five of them when I'm looking for a pen to write down a message.
6. Video games: I have a sizeable stack of games for the PS3 and Wii that need to be either gotten rid of or played to completion.
7. War and Peace Board game: I have owned this game since I was fifteen. It seems really cool, but I don't think I will be able to convince anyone to play it with me more than once. I need to plan a guy's weekend and play it through, then send it off to greener pastures.
8. Five pounds: I need to get back on the exercise wagon. Thanks to my wife I have been eating pretty well and so I have gained a lot of weight. It would shed off pretty quick once I started exercising regularly.
9. Stuff under my bed: I believe random junk has accumulated under my bed that needs to be sorted and cleared out. I seem to do this every couple of years. It must be some sort of gravitational vortex.
10. Old work files: My office is suffering for junk piling up. I really need to do a purge before going on holidays.
11. Baby Toys: Baby Z has outgrown a bunch of her toys. We need to get rid of these toys before they overwhelms us. :)


I can't believe I got eleven things! Huzzah. Now getting them all clear away will be the challenge. It seems like a 21st problem that one accumulates stuff. I would say I should streamline, but then a bunch of people will lose their jobs if people aren't buying this stuff. This is why economics can be annoying. :)

Friday, December 10, 2010

Ripples in a pool - Tenth Ring

Lord be Leaping...  Reverb is in the House! (that is what I'm told they say at parties as I apparently don't go to any).

Prompt #10
December 10 – Wisdom Wisdom. What was the wisest decision you made this year, and how did it play out?


I once heard a story about a reporter who asked a Chinese scholar about his thoughts on the impact of the French Revolution . He looked back at the reporter and said simply. "It has been only two hundred years. Too soon to tell.". If one believe that life is Tapestry (as Picard was taught by Q in its unique sort of way), then the decisions that one makes ripple out far and wide, some have impacts, some don't. Some are wise and some are foolish only at the end of the road looking back which isn't really a fair test of the decision made at the time (in the heat of the moment). So reflecting on this year, there have been many choices that will hopefully come out wise, but I honestly believe it is too soon to tell. 


I don't want to give the sense that I'm coping out, but if the question had been what was the wisest decision I made in 2000 I believe with some careful thought I could answer that one.

Ripples in a Pool - Ninth Ring

Which I believe gave the Mandarin his disintegration beam

Reverb (Karate chop)

Prompt #9
December 9 – Party Prompt: Party. What social gathering rocked your socks off in 2010? Describe the people, music, food, drink, clothes, shenanigans

Aargh. I didn't really go to any "parties" per say. I think my favorites would be a tie between the Harlequin Friends Reunion Dinner we had at a restaurant near St. Clair on Yonge (it was a fun conversation and was the first time I saw Angry Birds on the iphone) and My book club gathers (good food and conversation and we have actually had more the 3 sessions!).

I need to get out more. :)

Ripples in a Pool - Eighth Ring

Eight Maids a Milking... Reverb continues.

Prompt #8
December 8 – Beautifully Different. Think about what makes you different and what you do that lights people up. Reflect on all the things that make you different – you’ll find they’re what make you beautiful.


Wow. This one is tough. It is hard to talk well about one's self without coming across as rather self-centred (which might be why I have trouble writing a blog). Okay, I'll give it a shot. The most obvious feature I think is my height. I'm quite tall and I think that give me a presence that one could find appealing. I have eyes that change colour. I truly find people interesting and have a tendency to ramble on when I'm nervous.I have been told that I'm too nice, and some time I wish I could always be that nice guy. I like smart people and being smart. Their is beauty in listening to intelligence as well as speaking it. I like a good walk. 


I'm not sure how different that is from anyone else, as everyone can be beautiful if only in one way and only for a period of time. One of my great wishes would be to figure out to see it easily in other people. To have that sober second thought ready and at hand.


I hope that wasn't too self-indulgent or flippant. I wonder why it's hard to speak of one's own beauty. Is it a Canadian thing? a guy thing?

Ripples in a Pool - Seventh Ring

Swans a swimming. Is Reverbing a word?

Prompt #7
December 7 – Community. Where have you discovered community, online or otherwise, in 2010? What community would you like to join, create or more deeply connect with in 2011?


I'm afraid that I don't really have much for this one. As I chose Waldeinsmakiet  to describe 2010, it is an indicator that I haven't really connected to any new communities this year. I have maintained most of my older ones, but a few have slide a bit due to the present of my new daughter. As an aside comment, while on paternal leave for half the year I found community building tough for a stay at home Dad. All the Mom's and Nannies have their groups, but they are never really sure of the Man with the baby. Even the rare man you meet there is an awkwardness between you. So, Strike three on Community I suppose.

Ripples in a Pool - Sixth Ring

I a bit behind. I think I'll just get these up to date today.

Reverb Prompt #6
December 6 – Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it? 


Well, this one can be taken every ways. Hmmmm. I make spreadsheets every day, as well as food to eat,  dream etc. I think the last physical think I made was a black & white inked drawing on the bottom of one of our Christmas cards. I also made a little booklet of a short story I have written for my brother. 


Many people who know me would comment that I'm not one to make many physical things as I don't like getting dirty. I disagree. I don't mind getting dirty if I'm making something good. :)

Sunday, December 5, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Fifth Ring

Five Golden Rings!!!!

Prompt #5 (December 5th) - Let Go:

 Let Go. What (or whom) did you let go of this year? Why? 


Arrgh. This one is really hard, possibly because I didn't really let go of anything--which I believe is where a lot of my problems stem from. I suppose I could say that I let go of my anger all the time. One can get worked up so easy about nonsense really (and many times very legitimate anger) and then you have to let it go because you are not five or in high school anymore.  The main problem is that when you give it up, you end up picking it up again, like an old sock, or a thick book you keep saying you'll get through one day. 


I think I need to work on this one. :)

Ripples in a Pool - Fourth Ring

This Reverb exercise continues:

Prompt # 4 (December 4th) - Wonder

How did you cultivate a sense of wonder in your life this year? 


This one is thankfully easy. The main way I cultivated my sense of wonder was reading non-fiction this year. I mean the in depth material, not the newspaper (as it tends to make one angry/sad/mad/relieved--not that one shouldn't read the paper, just not when they are tired). If you have any doubt that the world isn't as amazing as the Discovery song claims, just dig into any subject on this great world of ours and be amazed at the combination of simplistic complexity that is Life on Earth. Every day I'm just impressed with just how much is out there. I should point out that I do read a lot of fiction, but I don't read it for wonder...well sometimes I do 


I should point out that I also listen to a lot of non fiction (just to name a few): www.ted.com, www.bigthink.com, www.tvo.org, ABC or BBC radio documentaries, Ideas on CBC, entitled opinions. There is a lot out there to amaze. Three Cheers to Science!!!

Ripples in a Pool - Third Ring

Reverb10 continues- Some of these are proving quite hard:

Prompt #3 (December 3rd)  - Moment

 Pick one moment during which you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors).


This is totally sappy, but there have been a number of moments with my new daughter. She's eighteen months now and her world is so much smaller than mine. Its a process of reduction when you're drawn into her play. If I had to pick one specific moment that would be a spring day when I was still on paternal leave. We had gone to the park because it was somewhat warm, and to be honest we didn't have anywhere else we needed to be. The air was fresh, the park was largely empty that morning and my daughter walked around collecting sticks and discarded toys to put in a pile near her stroller. We were the only people in the world and the stick pile drew laughs with every stick drop. Baby excitement is contagious.


short but true.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Ripples in a Pool - Second Ring

Reverb continues with Prompt #2:

Prompt #2 (December 2nd) Writing
What do you do each day that doesn’t contribute to your writing — and can you eliminate it?


There is a desire to make this abstract--the secular, 21st century version of  "the Gods" or "the Fates" and essentially moving it beyond the control of a mere mortal and therefore is a statement seeking pity rather than resolution. So, I'm fighting my first response and going with a more mundane one; Passive consumption.


I tend to convince myself that I need to consume one more thing (web essay, video, book, comic etc.) before I clear my mind and set myself down to the task at hand. That this information is key to what I need to do. A perfect example would be instead of working on a piece of writing on my lunch I watch a couple of podcasts on video games, the history of Greek philosophy, the nature of the atom, etc. rather than simply write. The world is a wonderful place and one can lose time it in so easily. 


Can I eliminate it? I honestly don't know, but I believe that I can reduce it. That said, there's a balance between avoiding knowledge for your own good and missing out on knowledge for your own bad. Besides, there is one's ability of win trivial pursuit that must be considered. In conclusion, I need to put down the book, stop the video and concentrate.


Two Down today, Two tomorrow.

Ripples in a Pool - First Ring

There is a December Challenge going around called Reverb 10  that has been recommended by Becky as a possible way to make one's blog posts more regular. Regular posting being the curse of all Internet contributors, I decided to give it a try.  I'm a little late to the game so I will do Exercise one and two today, then three and four tomorrow (getting all caught up by Sunday - five).

Prompt #1 (From December 1st): One Word
One Word. Encapsulate the year 2010 in one word. Explain why you’re choosing that word. Now, imagine it’s one year from today, what would you like the word to be that captures 2011 for you? (Author: Gwen Bell)


If I had to choose a word to express 2010, I would have to go with Waldeinsmakiet (German: The feeling of being alone in the woods). At first blush it might seem like a sad word, yet walking alone in the woods is a bit more layered than that. There's a different kind of silence in the woods (which really isn't silence) that makes the mind wander in a quiet, subdued way. It might be the rhythm of walking or how everything changes slowly in the woods when one chooses to sit and gaze out at it or the pleasure of silence that only a city dweller finds unique. Many a good story has started in a woods (Brida, The Divine Comedy, Robin Hood, Stardust, most fairy tales). As far as expressing my year, there has been a feeling that intellectually (and maybe emotionally)  I have been wandering a woods by myself, finding trails made by others who I don't meet but still follow, making discovers with no one to talk to about, quiet moments where a simple, happy memory forms and finally weariness from at lot of walking. If you have never done so, I recommend packing a day bag and going to a Conservation Area near you and try walking a trail. 


2011? I guess it would be tie between Taarradhin “a way of resolving a problem without anyone losing face”(ie. everyone wins).or Meraki “to do something with soul, creativity, or love”. Taaradhin appeals to my romantic notion of the happy ending. That all the resolutions one makes at the beginning of the year are checked off, family & friends are happy, and enemies have changed their colours (Epic Win!).  There is a danger in it being too close to an obsession with perfection, but in reality its truth lies in compromise. I hope that at the end of 2011 my major "problems" have found a resolution to please all parties. Meraki is more basic desire, a hope that no matter what happens, I have done it with passion. I could live with either word.


One down, One to go.